This is motherhood: timestamp edition

6:30: (dinner) Child A- Oh dinner! Oh, chicken and (enthusiasm wanes) burgers, can I please have,  I mean, may I not have, oh hmmm, can I not have a burger please? Was that a nice enough way to ask?

6:35: More ketchup, please.

6:37: Chores? (Angry plastered glares- heat intensity of one trillion.) What do you mean chores still exist today? I won't ever do them.

Child A- I'm going to throw you in the garbage and them l will never have to do chores again.

Me- Then all your sheets and clothes will smell like garbage and all you will have left to eat is kale, broccoli,  tomatoes, and coffee,  all day  every day.  And your whole body will stink, because no one will remind you to take a bath, and you can never watch a show again, because no one will pay the electricity bill or the internet.

Child A- I will take everything it of dad's wallet and walk to the store. 

Me- good luck.

Child A-  I will do  the bank then.

Me- and then you will go to jail and have no mom.

Child A-  Fine! Well when I get older I will make my kids do chores and ask nicely for ice cream.

Me- Fine.

6:42: 
Child B-  I'm going to be a happy orphan and eat ice cream all day.

Child C- No! I love Mommy!

6:52: There are six knees and elbows digging into my side's. Six little eyes watching every page and waiting for every word. Heads resting on my shoulders.  We read 5 books this way.

7:10: I want this book! NO I WANT IT. No me! NO ME!

7:14: Child B falls on the floor in tears,  fighting off a massive bear hug, crying because the sky is  blue, because the sun is hot, because it's Tuesday. It is a mystery.  So, she resists until she curls up in a ball and rests her head on my knee, while I sing, Moon River.

7:18:
Child C- I can't brush my teeth without a grown-up!

7:30: Child A- Good night mom!
          Child B- Good night mom, it's okay to be emotional, right?   -yeah honey.
          Child C- Good night, mommy!

7:34:  Look into the eyes of my husband, mirroring the exhaustion of a thousand burning suns.
This is Us Season finale starts real soon.  Good-bye forever.